Sitting with Fear and Vulnerability: An Act Towards Change

Many of my clients and students have asked, “Why do I have to be present in meditation with my fear? Doesn’t sitting with that fear manifest the very thing I am not wanting in my life? Such as more fear.”


It can be confusing with the popular sentiment of positive thinking and manifesting what our ego desires by thinking and being what we desire. For example, many of these teachings tell us that if we want to manifest money in our life then we must see ourselves as wealthy.


The problem with this is that we lose the opportunity to discover the wealth of potential within ourselves by not feeding ego desires in order to avoid egoic fears.  The inner strength and wholeness of who we are and the ability to express that depth of stillness results from holding our vulnerability in the moment without the ego defense–in openness. For example, by sitting with the fear of living with lack of material wealth, that which drives our desire for wealth, then we begin to release the ego’s defense against lack and we no longer fear scarcity. We awaken to stillness with what is. Then, out of that stillness, we have free will and choice to create from our larger being.  If it is the nature of our being to have wealth, wealth will manifest.


The quote by my teacher, Dr. Brugh Joy reflects the essence of this teaching.


“It’s impossible to go through renewal without some kind of death. When you move towards vulnerability, a more transcendent energy begins to operate. If you do not experience powerlessness, there is no awakening” Brugh Joy, M.D.

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